Rules of adulting

1)  Don’t fucking cuss.

2) It’s you’re mission [sic] to see to it that every rule is followed to a T.

3) When making a joke, be sure to tread the line between satirical word-smithing and the offensive. For example: dead baby jokes. Sure they’re funny, but you don’t want to be like the baseball that came out of left field and struck baby’s temple, rendering him dead. Don’t kill baby. Joke responsibly.

4) Although you won’t know everything, it’s amazing how much you can make others think you know or how well put together you are by merely combining rarely-used words with long sentence structures.

5) Follow your gut.

6) Irony is cool

7) Ironing is cool

8) Slant rhymes are cool

9) Bow ties are cool

9) As are rhetorical devices. But be careful. You don’t want to fall into a pattern–a pattern that leads to words out of control: lost in a world of escalation and emotion and passion before suddenly calling prey to opposing ideas.

10) Admit it. You like Taylor Swift.

11) Breathe.

12) Be a roll model

Like Meg Buscema, the President of Cinnabon

Feature photo by Clementine Daily

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2 Comments Add yours

  1. Erik says:

    Some actual truth amid the humor here, Raul. Love it.

    I rarely do this, but for those who might like some further thoughts, I do strongly believe that one need not (and should not) leave childlike ways in becoming an adult, and have written about it often, most recently in a four-part series called “big kids” (caps intentional):

    Blog mini-series “big kids” starts here:

    1. raulrgonza says:

      It’s all good. I read those posts and loved em!

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