11 Bad Jokes to Brighten Your Day

Distance running and I are not quite on the best of terms. We get along cordially, but it’s not a loving embrace. But in an attempt to keep my mind off of the lactic acid buildup and heavy breathing, the last time I went running with my girlfriend I had a chance to think things through: namely puns! I shall henceforth call them pun runs. Here are the fruit of my labor:

  • What do you call a Yorkshire Terrier from New York City?
    • A New Yorkie
  • What breed of dog is the best to have when moving?
    • A Boxer
  • What do you call a West Highland Terrier from Virginia?
    • A Westie Virginian
  • What breed of dog is the worst at shutting up?
    • A Malamute
  • What do Texans call a Pit Bull?
    • A WHEEEEEE DAUGY!
    • What do Texans call a Yorkie?
      • A WHEEEEEEE DAUGY!
      • What do Scots call a Yorkie?
        • A wee doggy.

Jokes

  • Which breed of dog loves cream cheese?
    • A beagle
  • Which breed of dog does Homer Simpson have?
    • A DOHberman
  • What’s the most important state in America?
    • Maine
  • Which state is the market leader in the pork industry?
    • New HAMshire
  • Which state has the highest rate of sickness in the US?
    • Illinois
  • Where did Noah’s ark sink?
    • Arkansas

Now go, and be healthy. Maybe rediscover some childhood activities?

A quick side note: those who know me know that I love fonts and typographic design. The header image is NOT COMIC SANS, rather a font called Comic Neue. Comic Neue is a redesigned and prettier version of Comic Sans MS. Best of all, it has been released into the public domain, so free downloads for all! Click here to get it. If you use Comic Sans at all. Stop. Please. And get Comic Neue here.

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